What Matters Most
Where is the wisdom that is lost in knowledge? Where is the knowledge that is lost in information? CS Lewis wrote these words and they are as true today as they were then. In a world so filled with information available to us at breakneck pace it is hard to imagine living a day where we were cutoff from it. In a world where technology so freely gives us the tantalizing, the lucrative, the creative and the answers, I ask, where is the work? One of my earliest memories of my own Father is being in the front yard while he and my uncle worked on a stock car that they were tuning up for the weekend race. Meticulously he worked to achieve the best balance, if successful it meant a chance for the win, if not, it meant a tow home and trip back to the drawing board. This was a simple hobby, but it was clear to me even as a child that this was an example of a man's quest for wisdom. To know of something through his own study, to create out of chaos and to test his own determination when all seems to be going wrong.
I have written many times about the influence my Dad has been on me and the moments where he has been there to tell me what I need to hear rather than what I want to hear. This is undoubtedly one of the most important relationships in my life. But when it comes to wisdom, there is one person who has taught me more than any person in this world. And the story of how I came to know this goes like this...
Just the other day I was remembering back to when I found out I needed to be treated with Chemotherapy to stop the cancer cells from their pursuit to kill me from the inside. I remember being so scared inside that I simply did not know what else to do. So I did what any person would do, I pretended to be strong and acquired as much information on what would be taking place as possible. The Doctor complemented me on my understanding of the blood markers and the treatment to follow, although I think deep down he wished that I would stop asking so many questions. But I was afraid and I felt that by devouring information that I could find truths. But despite his compliment I was still sad, despite all my studying and information I was still miles from the answer that I desired, wisdom that it would all be OK in the end. The certainty that I was seeking at this moment seemed completely and utterly unattainable.
Despite all the you tube videos, information and research, I will never forget how scared I was as she prepared the needle. Made worst by the fact that she missed the first time and had to start all over, I felt like getting out of the chair and running out of the building as fast as I could. Maybe I could hie from this disease in my house? Maybe I will be healed by a miracle? I shouldn't be here? All of these played through my head at a speed that was causing me to question all that I thought I knew earlier in the morning. But what is most important is the moment that followed that I will always remember. The moment followed just prior to the second, first injection has played out time and again in my mind. Erin forcefully grasping my hand, told me look her in the eyes and said, "listen, I am here with you, we are going to be just fine." There was wisdom in her eyes, not of knowledge of the future that she herself was not sure of, not information regurgitated from some scholarly journal, but of the certainty of US. To the untrained onlooker we probably looked like two scared kids, but when our eyes met, the seas of my soul went calm and at that moment I knew certainty, at that moment I found wisdom.
Our lives, like a farmer in a field so tenderly cultivating the ground in a way only he knows how has wisdom in knowing his land, in knowing his capability that a person trying to grow a garden off of a pinterest article can only dream of having. To one it is about information and following instructions, to the other, it is a craft requiring timing, ingenuity and day long labor to reap his harvest. For one failure will be determined by if he or she forgets or loses interest, for the other failure is not an option.
If you asked the farmer before each season if he was scared, he would likely agree. But the work is important because of those he is working for. My lovely wife taught me this lesson on that summer day 4 years ago. The lesson that in a world of uncertainty and chaos, that only loves embrace can calm the aching soul and makes a person press forward in the face of what seems to be insurmountable odds.
But still, many will tell you that love is a myth, that is is compatibility that matters most, that it is happenstance and not fate that connects us, and it is choice and not faith that keeps us bound. Life teaches a great many, a very hard lesson when it comes to love, the lesson is one that leads many to separation and divorce. That lesson is one of relationship apathy, when the day to day challenges of being yoked in marriage cause them to slowly forget about the eternal plan for their marriage. Gone are thoughts of courtship and laying under the stars talking for hours on end dreaming about still doing this as an old, well seasoned married couple. Gone are the memories of a proposal and a promise of forever. In its place are items of far less certainty as mutual respect and oneness is replaced by bitter rivalry and a card full of old scores.
But take it from a man who has felt the stinging cold of night and was warmed by the wisdom in the eyes of his love and exercise the following truths.
Confidence in your relationship
Courage that your creator has made your hearts for each other
Composure during the negative pressures of life to believe in your love and its unconditional promise.
Believe this and obtain your plan so when you look back, your life will be a story of two growing into one. Your life's will be bound together so tight that neither dust nor mite can come between.
If you believe it is too late, I challenge you to try the following and look into the eyes of your spouse every day this week. Picture those eyes growing old with yours, where will the wrinkles be from millions of smiles? Feel the connection and see your past, a past that only the two of you know, What memory are you thinking of? See the eyes that have been with you at your weakest, see the eyes that were there with you during life's most treasured moments.
After the week, take a moment and think about what it would be like to be without him/her. It is at this moment that you will see what I saw on that day when I was afraid I would lose it all. The moment that I saw something in those eyes that is beyond worded description. Life is fragile and so is love, tread lightly.
I have written many times about the influence my Dad has been on me and the moments where he has been there to tell me what I need to hear rather than what I want to hear. This is undoubtedly one of the most important relationships in my life. But when it comes to wisdom, there is one person who has taught me more than any person in this world. And the story of how I came to know this goes like this...
Just the other day I was remembering back to when I found out I needed to be treated with Chemotherapy to stop the cancer cells from their pursuit to kill me from the inside. I remember being so scared inside that I simply did not know what else to do. So I did what any person would do, I pretended to be strong and acquired as much information on what would be taking place as possible. The Doctor complemented me on my understanding of the blood markers and the treatment to follow, although I think deep down he wished that I would stop asking so many questions. But I was afraid and I felt that by devouring information that I could find truths. But despite his compliment I was still sad, despite all my studying and information I was still miles from the answer that I desired, wisdom that it would all be OK in the end. The certainty that I was seeking at this moment seemed completely and utterly unattainable.
Despite all the you tube videos, information and research, I will never forget how scared I was as she prepared the needle. Made worst by the fact that she missed the first time and had to start all over, I felt like getting out of the chair and running out of the building as fast as I could. Maybe I could hie from this disease in my house? Maybe I will be healed by a miracle? I shouldn't be here? All of these played through my head at a speed that was causing me to question all that I thought I knew earlier in the morning. But what is most important is the moment that followed that I will always remember. The moment followed just prior to the second, first injection has played out time and again in my mind. Erin forcefully grasping my hand, told me look her in the eyes and said, "listen, I am here with you, we are going to be just fine." There was wisdom in her eyes, not of knowledge of the future that she herself was not sure of, not information regurgitated from some scholarly journal, but of the certainty of US. To the untrained onlooker we probably looked like two scared kids, but when our eyes met, the seas of my soul went calm and at that moment I knew certainty, at that moment I found wisdom.
Our lives, like a farmer in a field so tenderly cultivating the ground in a way only he knows how has wisdom in knowing his land, in knowing his capability that a person trying to grow a garden off of a pinterest article can only dream of having. To one it is about information and following instructions, to the other, it is a craft requiring timing, ingenuity and day long labor to reap his harvest. For one failure will be determined by if he or she forgets or loses interest, for the other failure is not an option.
If you asked the farmer before each season if he was scared, he would likely agree. But the work is important because of those he is working for. My lovely wife taught me this lesson on that summer day 4 years ago. The lesson that in a world of uncertainty and chaos, that only loves embrace can calm the aching soul and makes a person press forward in the face of what seems to be insurmountable odds.
But still, many will tell you that love is a myth, that is is compatibility that matters most, that it is happenstance and not fate that connects us, and it is choice and not faith that keeps us bound. Life teaches a great many, a very hard lesson when it comes to love, the lesson is one that leads many to separation and divorce. That lesson is one of relationship apathy, when the day to day challenges of being yoked in marriage cause them to slowly forget about the eternal plan for their marriage. Gone are thoughts of courtship and laying under the stars talking for hours on end dreaming about still doing this as an old, well seasoned married couple. Gone are the memories of a proposal and a promise of forever. In its place are items of far less certainty as mutual respect and oneness is replaced by bitter rivalry and a card full of old scores.
But take it from a man who has felt the stinging cold of night and was warmed by the wisdom in the eyes of his love and exercise the following truths.
Confidence in your relationship
Courage that your creator has made your hearts for each other
Composure during the negative pressures of life to believe in your love and its unconditional promise.
Believe this and obtain your plan so when you look back, your life will be a story of two growing into one. Your life's will be bound together so tight that neither dust nor mite can come between.
If you believe it is too late, I challenge you to try the following and look into the eyes of your spouse every day this week. Picture those eyes growing old with yours, where will the wrinkles be from millions of smiles? Feel the connection and see your past, a past that only the two of you know, What memory are you thinking of? See the eyes that have been with you at your weakest, see the eyes that were there with you during life's most treasured moments.
After the week, take a moment and think about what it would be like to be without him/her. It is at this moment that you will see what I saw on that day when I was afraid I would lose it all. The moment that I saw something in those eyes that is beyond worded description. Life is fragile and so is love, tread lightly.
Comments
Post a Comment